Universities had been long renowned for ‘skit’ or parody newspapers. During my brief tertiary career at the University of Melbourne (1975-77), The Uni Star made its debut. And I guess I could have perhaps been slightly responsible. Maybe.

Farrago was the weekly campus newspaper at Melbourne, and in 1976 it was under the joint (good word that, for the times) editorship of Colin Golvan and Campbell Smith. At age 19, I was the media writer, with a syndicated column in Farrago, Lot’s Wife (Monash), Rabelais (La Trobe), Catalyst (RMIT) and Honi Soit (Sydney). My Farrago colleagues included Steve Vizard (Dine Out), Imre Salusinsky (politics) and Simon Plant (theatre).

One prank newspaper that year included the Farrago front-page headline ‘Examinations Cancelled’. That edition was largely the work of Simon Whelan. The edition caused mayhem with a tongue-in-cheek report that the Exhibition Buildings had been double-booked for a camping show, and the venue for the exams was unavailable. Whelan was reported as prepared to start a hunger strike in protest at the cock-up. A number of high-ranking academics fell for the hoax, and were not amused when the truth was revealed.

Earlier in the year, in an era of red-top right-wing tabloids such as Maxwell Newton’s Sunday Observer and Rupert Murdoch’s Sydney Daily Mirror, for a laugh we decided that Farrago could do with its own tabloid competitor. Enter The Uni Star, another hoax.

Complete with ‘War Is Declared’ fonts, the front-page screamed ‘Piss Off Farrago’. The accompanying story read: “That’s our advice to the bumbling Laurel and Hardy of Farrago, Editors Campbell Smith and Colin Golvan.

“Bogged down in heavy left-wing politics, Farrago is serving no useful purposed but to waste precious money. Already this year, the Socialist Left ALP and Farrago have had a confrontation as can be witnessed with an ‘editorial tennis match’.”

The Uni Star, in true tabloid style with a Page 2 headline of ‘Drunken Danby’, accused Students’ Representative Council executive member Michael Danby (who was in on the joke) of “disgusting behaviour” at a dinner for author Donald Horne. “Onlookers were shocked to see the SRC members consume glass after glass in a quite irresponsible manner.”

There were feature articles ‘Don Lane Undressed’ (by Debbie Joffe), and Jesus Christ Superstar (by Leonard Cooper, later reportedly Derryn Hinch’s Rolls-Royce chauffeur).

The newspaper was printed at Waverley Offset Printers in Mulgrave. And I transported all bundles of the eight-page newspaper back to the University, in return for petrol money (next to nothing) and an on-campus parking permit (priceless).

The rest of the paper included sensationalist stories about a Union House lift being out of order, SRC motions being void, and censoring of Farrago articles on the grounds of sexism. However, The Uni Star had its own problems with sexism. To emulate the red-tops, the paper had a Page 3 girl: a female university student sitting atop one of the phallic symbol pieces of architecture on campus.

The sisterhood took possession of all 5000 copies of The Uni Star and set them all on fire in front of the Union building. And yes, press reports said they also burnt their bras. It meant that, in a number of ways, no-one ever saw the joke.

• Colin Golvan became a QC at the Victorian Bar. Simon Whelan became Judge Simon Whelan of the Supreme Court of Victoria. Michael Danby was MHR for Melbourne Ports from 1998 to 2019. Ash Long remains a journalist, and apologises to his mother for his bad language in the headline, all those 45 years ago.